Stoic Solutions: How Marcus Aurelius Would Handle Modern Workplace Drama
- gertrudeagbozo
- 2 days ago
- 6 min read
Somewhere between leaving corporate America and joining the Peace Corps, someone gave me their copy of The Spiritual Teachings of Marcus Aurelius by Mark Forstater. That’s when I began my journey to being unbothered—and for the record it still feels like I am at the beginning of the road.
Nearly two thousand years ago, Marcus Aurelius (M.A.) ruled the Roman Empire while dealing with plague, war, and political backstabbing. Yet in his private journal—what we now call Meditations—he didn't write about grand strategy. He wrote about everyday frustrations we still face: difficult coworkers, unfair criticism, and keeping your cool when everything goes wrong.
Anecdotally, it seems like the people in my world are all experiencing more conflict, whether in paid work or volunteering. Let’s turn to my favorite of the stoics. His wisdom is surprisingly useful for modern office life. Here's how M.A. would handle the most common workplace people problems we face today.
The Credit-Stealing Coworker
The Situation: You worked late for weeks on a presentation. In the meeting, your coworker presents "their" ideas—which are actually yours—and the boss loves it.
The Typical Response: Rage. Calling them out publicly. Complaining to everyone. Planning revenge! The latter is what I would consider first.
M.A.'s Approach:
M.A. would start by asking: "What can I actually control?" Your coworker's behavior? No. Your boss's opinion? No. Your response? Absolutely.
M.A. wrote: "Choose not to be harmed—and you won't feel harmed. Don't feel harmed—and you haven't been" (Aurelius 4.7). The credit-stealer took credit. They didn't take your skills or your ability to do great work again. He'd tell you to address it calmly and privately: "I noticed you presented the framework I developed. In the future, I'd appreciate credit." No drama. Just clarity.
If they keep doing it, M.A. would remind you that their bad character is their problem, not yours. He wrote: "When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: The people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and surly" (Aurelius 2.1). He wasn't being negative—just realistic.
The best move? Keep doing excellent work. Make your contributions visible through your actions. The truth usually comes out eventually.
The Micromanaging Boss
The Situation: Your manager questions every decision, rewrites your emails, and schedules meetings about your meetings. You can't breathe.
The Typical Response: Silent resentment. Doing the bare minimum. Stress that ruins your evenings and weekends.
M.A.'s Approach:
First, he'd ask whether this is about control or fear. M.A. ran an empire but wrote constantly about his own worries and doubts. He'd recognize that most micromanagers act from insecurity, not evil intentions. This doesn't excuse the behavior, but it changes how you see it. It's not personal—it's someone dealing with their own issues.
M.A. would tell you to do great work anyway: "Do every act of your life as though it were the very last act of your life" (Aurelius 2.5). Not for your boss's approval, but because that's who you are.
Practically? Give your manager information before they ask. Anticipate their concerns. Make it easier for them to trust you. If nothing changes, M.A. wouldn't judge you for leaving. Ancient stoics weren't about pointless suffering—they were about smart responses. Sometimes the smart response is to find a different job.
The Toxic Team
The Situation: Your team has split into cliques. There's gossip, backstabbing, and everyone cares more about office politics than actual work.
The Typical Response: Pick a side. Join the gossip to stay in the loop. Get cynical.
M.A.'s Approach:
M.A. would refuse to participate while staying kind to people caught up in it. He wrote: "The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury" (Aurelius 6.6).
Be the person who doesn't gossip. Who treats everyone with respect. Who focuses on work. That's not weakness—it's strength. When others complain, listen without adding fuel to the fire. Try: "That sounds tough. What do you think would help?"
M.A. would also remind you that you can't fix the whole culture, but you can be a pocket of sanity in it. "Waste no more time arguing about what a good person should be. Be one" (Aurelius 10.16).
Your example might change things. It might not. Either way, you've protected yourself.
The Unfair Performance Review
The Situation: Your review is harsh and wrong. Your wins are downplayed, your mistakes blown up. The rating feels completely unjust.
The Typical Response: Getting defensive. Arguing every point. Wondering if you're actually terrible at your job.
M.A.'s Approach:
M.A. would first separate facts from feelings. What specific feedback did you get? Look at it without the emotional charge. Is any of it valid? If the criticism is genuinely unfair, respond with facts and documentation. "Here are the results I delivered. Here's how they connect to our goals." Keep it simple.
But M.A. would also prepare you for the reality that fairness might not win. "Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions—not outside" (Aurelius 9.13).
Your worth isn't determined by one person's opinion. What matters is whether you're doing work that challenges you and aligns with your values. If this workplace can't see that, maybe it's time to find one that does.
The Overwhelming Workload
The Situation: You're drowning. Multiple urgent projects, back-to-back meetings, endless emails, growing expectations. You're working nights and weekends and still falling behind.
The Typical Response: Panic. Burnout. Either burning yourself out trying or becoming bitter.
M.A.'s Approach:
Even as emperor during a plague and multiple wars, M.A. wrote: "Confine yourself to the present" (Aurelius 7.29). Not the fifty things on your list—just the one thing you're doing right now.
He'd tell you to prioritize ruthlessly. What actually matters? What are you doing from fear rather than necessity? "You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think" (Aurelius 2.11).
That's not morbid—it's clarifying. If your time is limited (and it is), stop wasting it on things that don't matter.
M.A. would also question the whole situation. Is this workload even reasonable? Sometimes the right response isn't to cope better—it's to recognize that the situation itself is broken and needs to change.
Set boundaries. Delegate. Say no. If you can't do those things in your current role, the role itself might be the problem.
The Office Politics Game
The Situation: Getting ahead requires playing politics—networking with the right people, taking credit strategically, navigating unspoken rules you don't understand.
The Typical Response: Either refusing to play (and getting passed over) or playing reluctantly (and hating yourself).
M.A.'s Approach:
Here's where M.A. gets interesting. He was emperor—he understood power. But he wrote: "Ambition means tying your well-being to what other people say or do. Sanity means tying it to your own actions" (Aurelius 6.51).
He wouldn't tell you to ignore reality. Building relationships isn't corrupt. Making your work visible isn't shallow. The question is: Are you compromising your principles to get ahead?
M.A. survived the most dangerous political environment imaginable—the Roman court—by staying true to himself while being strategically sharp. Build real relationships. Advocate for yourself without tearing others down.
The key is motivation. Are you chasing advancement because you're insecure? Or because you genuinely want more impact?
"How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it" (Aurelius 11.18). Don't let office politics make you angry or anxious. Play the game only when it serves your real purpose—never at the cost of who you are.
The Bottom Line
Workplace drama feeds on our belief that outside stuff controls our happiness. Your coworker's behavior, your boss's opinion, your team's dysfunction—we think these things can ruin everything.
But the stoics understood something powerful: these events are neutral. Our judgments about them create our suffering.
This doesn't mean accepting abuse or staying in toxic situations. It means recognizing that your core—your principles, your peace, your purpose—can't be touched by office nonsense, unless you allow it.
Do excellent work. Treat people with respect. Stand up for yourself calmly. Set clear boundaries. And remember that no job, no matter how impressive, is worth losing yourself.
As M.A. wrote: "At dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: 'I have to go to work—as a human being. What do I have to complain of, if I'm going to do what I was born for—the things I was brought into the world to do?'" (Aurelius 5.1).
Even surrounded by workplace squabbles, you're still practicing something bigger: being the person you want to be. That was enough for an emperor. It's enough for us, too.
Works Cited
Aurelius, Marcus. Meditations. Translated by Gregory Hays, Modern Library, 2002.
Which of M.A.'s principles would be hardest for you to apply, and why? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
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